Before I understood the balance of power God instilled in women, I failed to speak up with courage in our marriage. I want to tell you why I wrote “Ponder It . . . Then Speak the Truth in Love” back in July, 2010. My lack of understanding of what the Bible teaches together with my fear of stepping up and expressing who I am, brought suffering to our relationship. Eric could not know what I thought, because I was afraid to say what I thought, afraid of his reactions. I was unaware of the power of my personal perspective.
Built into every female is a counterpart point of view. Because you are “created in the image of God” you have wisdom, and because of your particular part of that image the wisdom is “female.” When you assume your privileged position you bring love, respect and balance to your marriage.
Stepping up with courage to express who you are and what you think—carefully speaking truth from your point of view, speaking it thoughtfully and with respect for him—is a key to bringing understanding to your marriage.
He may react to your views; they are often surprising to him! You are “building your house” when you speak up: your perspective is the other half of your marriage. He must admire this, even if at first he is irritated. You can be sincere if you speak with respect and admiration for him. Remember, like you, he is created in the image of God. His reaction and surprise at what you think will eventually fade; his recognition of your courage and respect for him will emerge.
Step up and express the truth in love. You are the balance of power in your marriage. Ultimately you will win his heart. You will win him because every day you are thoughtful and caring.
I failed in this point in the beginning of our marriage. But within a few years I won my husband’s respect. Both of us have grown! You can build closeness and happiness with the man you spend the rest of your life with.