Our first four years married, we lived in a thirty-foot long trailer home. When I made curtains for the living room, I began to realize my love for the colors that I still choose: rust, brown and green. Even this tiny abode felt like home; I grew to love it. When Joshua and Josiah were born, we still lived there. Even a tiny “home” can feel satisfying and inviting. Eric left for work before daylight every morning; we ate homemade granola by candle light.

Mom told me I was doing well, but my “perfection’ tendencies took some of the joy out of the doing of it. You feel pressure to run a perfect household. But what is the perfect household? There may not be one.

Have you ever thought about it? You feel ownership of your role at home. Your female persona with such a special touch makes you “ruler of a family” (cf: oy-kod-es-pot-eh’-o or “guide [ruler] of the house”). Every person within your walls is safe and special; you are good at the details of “how everybody is doing”.

But home has your interest, your aura, your standards of order and kindness. It’s kind of a holy burden that God designates you as “guide of the house” in Titus 5. You are not jailed at home as in prison. Your home is where everybody wants to be.

Your way of life, hair, make up and the way you dress, even the preferences of food and free time, working at your gifts all are expressions of you. Have you thought of how many ways you express your gifts and personality every day? You run the household the way you do because you are an irreplaceable entity with a distinct personality. Trust your instincts, do not fret about perfection. Perfection is a place we are going, not somewhere we live; we get a little closer each day.

What is a perfect household anyway? There probably aren’t any. But there are many, like mine, and yours, that are “in process”.

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  1. Ron says:

    Nice advice! I have already been hunting for something such as this for a time now. Thx!

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