From time to time a wife finds herself at odds with her husband over an issue. The issue could be minor – or huge – but in either case the different points of view must be resolved before there is progress. The arrival at the agreement is at the end of a path, a set of steps, a series of negotiations which must be traveled. This process of coming to agreement is more important than the agreement itself.

Each marriage partner must respect the other’s inspiration, their cautions, their “let’s wait and see,” or their “let’s do it now”. A wife needs to engage the process with her inborn intuitive wisdom. She needs to develop her awareness of it, and grow in courage, wisdom and knowledge. Becoming a cerebral and gently assertive wife is an adventure she cannot afford to miss. From Ecclesiastes: “Two (‘the second form being feminine’ in Hebrew) are better than one; because they have a good reward for their labor.” Ecc 4:9.

That is why it is a benefit for every husband to make a science of understanding his wife. As your husband studies you he learns to listen to and respect your viewpoint and, as a result, becomes wiser, more balanced.

A man has an aggressive, protective nature, needing to be recognized for it by you. He is the Head in your marriage, assigned to that position by God. As his counterpart, you are as the heart, arms and legs. You think with a protective, guarded, “she bear–like” attitude toward your marriage, your home and your future together. Remember, “Every wise woman builds her house…” She sets it up securely.

Together, you create a powerful relationship that is monumental in its significance; you are building the future: a strong household, a strong family, a strong nation, a better world. A marriage is as a Head and Body according to the Bible. It is a most intriguing subject; one vital for you to understand. Wives are not reactionary creatures, whose only contribution to marriage is, “Yes sir,” as a daughter, or worse, a slave. There is a role to play which calls upon your utmost soul searching, your best wisdom and your dependence on God.

The agreement upon the issue is the goal, but the process of reaching it is our life.

1. How does being a “slave” hurt a marriage?
2. What about a wife should a husband study?

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  1. Anonymous says:

    I love the statement you said "This process of coming to agreement is more important than the agreement itself." This is a subject couples need today.

  2. marshkay says:

    Amen!! It truly isn't what's agreed upon, but as you mentioned, how important agreement is between a couple and their prayers: "Again I say to you that if two of you agree on earth, concerning anything that they ask, it will be done for them by My Father in heaven." Matt. 18:19 That's a way of being gathered together in His name, being in agreement. Also, confession is simply agreeing with God. Amos 3:3 "Can two walk together unless they are agreed?" Marriage is a process of walking out of life together in agreement, which is a difficult process that tests the Fruit of the Spirit. "How good and pleasant it is for brethren to dwell together in unity" in life, in love, in fellowship, in families, His Body, and especially in marriage. Psalms 133:1

    Great understanding in all the blogs! I believe that this is due to your godly wisdom and understanding and application of all the Word you've memorized as a child. (not to mention your experiences). Love your book, Lizzie! Excellent points.

  3. Lizzie says:

    Marshkay: Your insight has added an important dimension to this topic. Part of the adventure of bringing up one subject or another is to hear from you. Thanks you. Lizzie

  4. Charpy says:

    Yes, it definitely tests the fruit of the Spirit. It's not a job for sissies. The rewards won't be sissy rewards either. When you fill up your tank with the power of God, they you can do it out of the overflow. Nothing of real value comes easy. But it gets easier with practice.

  5. Lizzie says:

    Every thing worthwhile gets easier with practice. Yes; good comment.

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