One of the hottest debates today is about you? One of the questions in history is about how you “should” live as a girl, a woman, a wife. Even the word ”should” infers control. No wonder we react. No wonder we are sometimes afraid to even consider what God created when he created us: a woman completed the creation “and God saw that it was good”…for the whole world: for the present, the future, indeed for a future! “Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.” (Genesis 2:24)
Think positively about who you are from God’s view. You are a female, created in the image of God. That is the essence of ability, creativity and influence! Don’t react and run with fear that God in the Scripture is “out to put you in bondage” of some kind . . . though there are religions and men and cultures who do!
When our three sons were in high school I was an aerobics instructor at a gym several times a week. I instructed women and men. It wasn’t hard to out last the men; I was aerobically fit. My muscle strength, though, lagged way behind Eric’s when he and I went to the gym. I worked as hard as he did; I trained as often, lifted weights, and stretched, trying to grow in strength and flexibility. The weight he lifted was always double mine. As he grew so did I, but stayed at it at half the weight. Yes, there were girls at the gym who were developed physically . . . even so their smaller size proved my point.
Who wants to compete with men anyway? Your gifts, initiatives and ability is yours…but all women are created in the image of God, as are men: “So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them.” (Genesis 1:27)
I have not been called often to respond to threat or danger; Eric always has. My father always did. There was a time though: when my husband was going through several surgeries because of colon cancer; and later when seizures hit him, I stepped up. When our new town home had a mix-up with the tax laws it was the day before Eric’s major surgery, I sat on the twelfth floor at the tax office, until they decided to forego protocol and gave me a receipt.
You are equal creatively, with your gifts and your mind…but wonderfully unique. As every snowflake, every blade of grass, every tree, every cloud. You have gifts of warmth and relational acuity, and probably more than your husband has. You feel responsibility for the domicile and children more naturally (and before) most men do. The little ones incline toward you for comfort, to a man more for strength. Think of the hole you make when you are not making a marriage whole, the home whole, the comfort level whole. The world is dreary without your vision and care. It is not arrogance to know that you make the world turn in your female, genius way . . .
Be courageous! Step up, “speaking the truth in love” and more than a privilege, you have rare opportunity to go directly to the challenge of being a whole female in marriage, in life. Build a future. Proverbs 31 is your send off: “Every wise woman builds her house . . . “. Having freedom, power and one-of a-kind privilege, you alone are married to this man. Love him. Appreciate him. He will repay big time!
Your husband does not know who you should be, but you will find that out as you grow!