If “Submission” means Blind Obedience . . . Only One of You is Doing The Thinking

Believing in your husband’s destiny means you are in this marriage for better or worse, which also means you are needed to make it the best marriage it can be: that means you counsel him with your best wisdom, you do not withhold it. If you support the gifts, aptitudes and destiny of your husband, helping him to succeed in them, you are yielding (submitting) to God and to him (as asked for in Eph 5:22).

But what if your wisdom advises something different than what your husband intends to do? You can either tell him, risking disagreement, or you could decide to keep silent. If submission is, “Yes sir; yes sir,” and that’s about it, you are not providing him with information which could be helpful to him. Do you want to see him successful, or is peace at any cost a better alternative? His success, like yours, is critical to the marriage. If failure is an ultimate goal for your marriage, silence could help you reach it.

Blind silent obedience leaves only a husband to do the thinking, planning and decision making. He will in essence be alone. And God stated, “It is not good for the man to be alone; I will make him a help, meet for him.” Go, speak the truth in love. You do make the difference

Helping him succeed is hard; it means offering your (usually) counterpart angle on issues. You must tell him what you think—sometimes what you think is in stark disagreement to his strong views. If you do not tell him, he will not know.

Did you know that your counterpart self is what your man needs desperately—that other, tempering opinion? It takes courage to be willing to endure a little discomfort in the process of learning to come to agreement. Come up with your best wisdom; offer this to the man who needs you to stand face to face in front of him. You are his equal opposite. You are indeed accomplishing a purpose that will reach far beyond your own life.

What Do You Think?

Is the idea of working at coming to agreement in your marriage a threat to your husband?

When you disagree, are you respectful to your “head”? When is it wise to “lay it down” for now? or forever?

Do you ever feel less significant than a man?  Do you know that you are also created in the image of God?

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