This morning I awoke feeling spiritually cold, deserted or at least distanced from my Father in Heaven. Though lately, it hasn’t been so, today was chemo day. It was the second of four sessions of cancer therapy.

Ever so weakly, I prayed, still lying in bed, unwilling to get up to face it. Chemo is a mysterious “friend”; it is a spy going through the body to find and kill the cancer cells where they may be lurking.

This morning tears emerged and I felt so sad. I prayed to my Father in Heaven, but not with much faith that this would change anything.

Then it happened: I remembered the email from Josh last night: “Be positive. . . the chemotherapy is like many tiny toothbrushes, brushing the cancer away.” I was thinking about his encouragement, when another son, Zach, called. I wasn’t clear voiced yet. “Mom, are you just waking up?” He was driving to work. “I know you’re going to get chemo today. How are you feeling about it? I will be thinking about you and praying for you. I love you.” That sounded like Zach; it also sounded like encouragement sent from God.

Then my husband said, “This is the day the Lord has made . . . ,” I responded, “We will rejoice and be glad in it.”

I checked the email: Betty, had a message for me with another boost. Kathleen called. Then as Eric and I had coffee on the porch I began to tell him about a speaking engagement that I had thought to duck out of, but was beginning to think I should agree to. My husband encouraged me to do it. I began to desire to do it.

Still before chemo, we read our daily Bible reading before breakfast. It was about Asa, King of Israel who sought the Lord, obeyed the words of God and he prospered . . .in the beginning. But later this good king fell away from God and ended up failing. He fell away from the All Powerful God who had given him every success, every victory; then arrogance did him in . . . and he died that way.

How sad to make a great effort to live a successful life, to follow in the Presence of God, to know the salvation Jesus offers freely, the power of the Holy Spirit . . . and then to blow it in the end.

God help me to live faithfully, filled with hope in God, and focus on the Father in Heaven who said through Jesus, “And lo, I am with you all the days, even to the end of the world.”

Now that is success.

So after the three hour chemotherapy session, the end of my day filled with hope, sweet comfort. My meds are working, my husband is here. God is good . . . I went for a forty minute bike ride in the evening. Thank you Lord.

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6 Responses to CHEMO DAY

  1. Michelle says:

    I am so happy to read the end of this day of yours…better than the beginning…may all our days filled with challenge bring us into His rest…love to you Lizzie.

  2. Lizzie Julin says:

    Thank you, friend.

  3. Dean says:

    I think of you so very much. Those days of chemo with my dear Mot are so fresh in my mind. Those days were good days of fellowship with each other, but also with total strangers who needed our cheer and trust in The Lord. We did that, and really never thought about it at the time. Now, know this, you are sent to testify of God’s love and forgiveness in lives you will touch through this experience. You are a shining light in a dark world! God has chosen you to do a job no one else can do! What a privilege!
    You are very very special indeed!!! I love you and continue to pray for God to bring you through this storm with great victory and calm. Much much love, Dean

  4. Lizzie says:

    Your comment is a challenge to fulfill the purpose God has for all of this: I hope and pray that I will. Your comment is also an encouragement to remember that all of this is for good reason; we have challenges as God allows them. I know you know this. God bless and encourage you, too

    • Febri says:

      I had a hemorrhagic storke. People suggested in the past that clothes with velcro would be easiest. Also this is my own thought-one zipper-easy, yes? A caftan would be gorgeous and gloves would be handy, I imagine. A nice turban if her hair is falling out, breathable outfits to wick away sweat like tencel or rayon, also maybe a straw hat, sickness of any type makes the patient more liable to dehydration.

  5. Olik says:

    I am actually one of the plpeoe that shaved their head before it all fell out. And I loved my long hair. I went to the fabric store and pick out my own.material and made my own bandannas I am going to have fun with it. I bought me some Dallas Cowboys material and some plain black to start out. Something light is good to cover the head for the summer time or a hat is also nice.

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